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  1. She's A Clubber

From the recording Coming Up From Down Under

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The characters in this song are too close to divulge! When asked about the future wife of one of my mates, another mate said, 'well she's alright, but she's a bit of a clubber... you know... put's her hair up...'
Well, there are enough words in this song to fill a normal album, so to say I was inspired is perhaps to understatement! My favourite line is, 'A jealous man, follows you in a Transit van, with a loaded gun'.
Needless to say, the girl turned out to be anything but... however, I still had the song! This is also the closest I came to a proper 'white rap' on the album.

Lyrics

Janine's out late, her fiancé waits at home
One eye fixed on the clock, and the other on the telephone
But she doesn't call
And the shadows creep, into uneasy sleep, somehow he falls
 
'Cause she's a clubber
Short skirt, puts her hair up and goes looking for
Hot love on a dark night
Answer to the question of trust is, not quite
Can I just say one thing, don't marry her!
 
He doesn't talk as much, oh, as he used to do
And when you ask how come, instead of thinking for one
He says, I just drink for two, oh what have I become?
A jealous man, follows you in a Transit van with a loaded gun
 
CHORUS
Janine's out late, her fiancé waits at home
One eye fixed on the clock, and the other on the telephone
But she doesn't call
And the shadows creep, into uneasy sleep, somehow he falls
 
'Cause she's a clubber
Short skirt, puts her hair up and goes looking for
Hot love on a dark night
Answer to the question of trust is, not quite
Can I just say one thing, don't marry her!
 
He doesn't talk as much, oh, as he used to do
And when you ask how come, instead of thinking for one
He says, I just drink for two, oh what have I become?
A jealous man, follows you in a Transit van with a loaded gun
 
CHORUS
 
Now she cooks and cleans, while he applies the Fahrenheit
And she pleads with him
She says 'baby won't you please stay in tonight'
 
But now he's a clubber
Nice shirt, puts a tie on and goes looking for
Hot love on a dark night
Answer to the question of trust is, is not quite
Can I just say one thing, she married a clubber
She found the answer to the question of trust
She found, the answer to the question of love
No you can never get enough
Enough back for what you give out
When you marry a clubber, yeah you waste nights
Just waiting, waiting by the phone
 
Now she cooks and cleans, while he applies the Fahrenheit
And she pleads with him
She says 'baby won't you please stay in tonight'
 
But now he's a clubber
Nice shirt, puts a tie on and goes looking for
Hot love on a dark night
Answer to the question of trust is, is not quite
Can I just say one thing, she married a clubber
She found the answer to the question of trust
She found, the answer to the question of love
No you can never get enough
Enough back for what you give out
When you marry a clubber, yeah you waste nights
Just waiting, waiting by the phone
You never wanted this, you never wanted to be alone
'Cause he's out, or your in, or she's out,
You've been had, you've been had by a clubber
So you get your gun
follow her off, to see what she's done
But all you get is soaking wet, and an empty barrel of fun
A little tingle in your wedding ring
And can I just say one thing, about trust
Yeah who can you trust?
And can I just say one more thing about love
You know, you'll never get enough
And can I just say one thing
Don't marry her!